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Archive for the ‘Solitude’ Category

Trust broken up, once and for all,
But no, I must not cry.
It’s over – yes, it’s over now,
Stand up and bid goodbye.

I never thought we had to part,
For no reason and rhyme.
But ah, once we were friends – and this,
Hurts deeply all the time.

The place where once I had my heart,
Now, carries only pain.
But I won’t cry, but I won’t shout,
But I must not complain.

It hurts me that she walked away,
Who once remained my friend.
Still I will share her all the prayers,
And care, I must extend.

Bestow on her the happiness,
And make her wounds all heal.
Oh Lord! Please let her rise again,
Give her the heart of steel.

No matter how much tough is life,
No matter how much dark.
Don’t let the tides wreck ourselves,
To shore, please bring the ark.

It’s not that easy, yes I know,
But one must always strive.
And so do I will try my best,
Hope that I would survive.

I’ll try to keep my tears unshed,
Smile, as much as I can.
It’s time to quit; it’s time to leave,
But like a gentleman.

(– Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green, 27th January 2014)

Broken Mirror

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O rest in peace – the poem is dead,
I doubt if ever it was born.
There is no light, there is no hope,
The ink has dried, and page is torn.

I wish I could have saved its life,
I wish I could have written more.
I wish I had not let it go,
I wish I had not closed the door.

It’s not the first, it’s not the last,
It happens every now and then.
The lifeless fingers cause to stop,
Then, no way can I move my pen.

But that one was close to my heart,
That one was which I love to be.
Ah, yet I had to do it, sad,
I killed it all; from A to Z.

The death of poem is death of mine,
But only if you ever care.
I may come back to life, but well,
It’s okay, I don’t ask for prayer.

(- Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green)

sculpture_by_AnnG

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Her home was silent – like a grave,
No footmark on the floor.
No sign of life; no voice, no light,
I stared at the door.

On all the walls, the paint was torn,
And dust laid on the chairs.
Will she come back? No, she will not,
Cried all those empty stairs.

My pulse was racing with a fear,
I turned my head to right.
She slowly dimmed and in the end,
Moved finally out of sight.

With heart filled with a steady pain,
And tired, aching feet.
I knew I had to walk in vain,
In dark and endless street.

I wish I could forget it once,
That ugly, awful lock.
Which yelled: now she is here no more,
The time was 4 O’ clock.

(- Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green)

That ugly, awful lock.

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She called him a gem,
But went for stone.
She ruled out him,
To choose unknown.

What lies in her heart?
She never shared.
She lost her time,
And hardly cared.

He fought with the walls,
But failed to break.
He earned only sorrow,
And lived in ache.

She said him goodbye,
Not even shook hands.
She left him alone,
And walked to new lands.

He waited for long,
And then gave up.
He left the chair,
With untouched cup.

Besides her smiles,
And the wedding chimes.
Life turned to have,
No rhythm and rhyme.

In a palace like home,
She found no space.
Every day, a new torment,
She had to face.

Then, one dark night,
Being doomed by scars.
She looked at the sky,
But got no stars.

She lost the sunshine,
Earned merciless rain.
She missed his warmth,
And cried in pain.

She had all the wealth,
With a man so tall.
But being unloved,
She was poorest of all.

With pillow in her arms,
Alone she slept.
Finding her soul empty,
Helplessly, she wept.

Her cheeks wrung pale,
And eyes turned wet.
She broke her bangles,
With a feel of regret.

The nights turned gloomy,
And the days so black.
She cursed her fate,
And wished him back.

But once who leaves,
Does never return.
And hence only memories,
One has to earn.

Few lessons in life,
We learn so late.
If we think in time,
Wouldn’t it be great?

(- Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green)

Image credit: http://dustfae.deviantart.com/art/Never-Alone-188330093

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Once, I was like a pale tree;
With the weak roots,
Slender branches,
And autumn all around me.
Solitude happened to be my guide.
Silence took a toll on my soul,
And left me just hollow from inside;
Along with silent eyes and empty hands,
Void of the pain of love.

Then, someone tread here like an angel;
Embraced me with a smile,
I was all arid,
She spelled a blissful rain of love.
And turned the soil of my soul into a garden.


You drifted among the flowers,
And I devoted my nectar to you.
You engraved your name on the stem,
And my skin got injured.
I played the flute of wind for you.
You sung, danced and swayed.
I burnt myself under the scorching heat,
While you slept under my shade.

You placed your arms around me,
And offered your shoulders to cry on.
I thought the season of sorrows is ended,
And I got a companion, someone – my own.

But ah, my love!

Now, you wish to leave me?
And want me to forget you.
Just because I am not a tall tree,
And couldn’t touch the sky for you?
Just because the symphonies I play, are sad,
And they can’t bring any joy for you.

I won’t stop you.
You could seek another garden.
(but I will not wait for anyone else.)

The only name,
Shining on my stem is yours.
(And that too written by you.)
You want me to erase it?

If once I do,
I will start dying again;
Root by root,
Words by words,
Nest by nest,
Birds by birds.

If once I do it,
The autumn will reign over me again;
Branch by branch,
Leave by leave,
Dawn by dawn,
Eve by eve.

If once I do it,
My garden will be withered again;
Day by day,
Hour by hour,
Moment by moment,
Flower by flower.

You wish to leave me?
I won’t stop you.

In your next journey,
You could find so many tall and beautiful trees,
With the outfit of the green fabric of the spring.
(Sometimes, I wish I could also be like them;
Handsome and strong – just like a king.)

But caution!

In such a beautiful gardens,
Hunters use to fix their nets,
They trap the butterflies.
Strip their wings away and steal their colours.
Such gardens are delusions.
Those who wish for them,
Chase nothing but the illusions.

You wish to leave me?
Go ahead.
I won’t stop you.
As I will already be dead;
Withered, pallid and infertile.


(- Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green)

Image credit: “The last tree” by Pygar

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Love can be deceiving sometimes.
It hurts, it aches, and it breaks.
But everything seems fine, If you put dust on.
To act clever.
But Caution!
A wind of regrets can blow all the dust away,
Leaving us lonelier than ever.

Love is blind;
Works over any expectation,
And even beyond.
What we really want at our hearts,
Is not really what our eyes see.

I learned this lesson,
before closing the last window,
When I promised myself,
Of “Sublimation”.

(Poor me.)

I asked myself,
To try to stay like that,
No matter what life throws at me.

At that moment, I thought,
Love has other reasons that reason has not.
Loneliness cuts us away from the people.
We always tend to take them as strangers to ourselves,
And world turns a pity to live in,
This tragedy remains the same,
No matter what corner of the universe we dwell.

I learned,
No one likes to die alone,
And we have that power,
Not to let ourselves to slide in a pit of despair.

Before closing the last window, I reckoned,
There is no peace for the human soul,
But to love and being loved.
I thought,
It’s a right time for me to move on,
And not to look back over my shoulders.

Before closing the last window, I learned,
Love, happiness and liberation are within us,
Not in the one, we want with us.

I thought, It’s hard to reach an inner balance.
And if is in cards to stay alone,
That would be,
(But don’t give up hoping.)

I decided not to deduce any meaning from anything,
As sometimes, demons seem more faithful than angels.
Sometimes, life is like that,
People close to us,
Don’t realise our need for more closeness.
They only feel stuffed.

Before closing the last window, I recalled,
Once she said that I had a tender heart;
So gentle and caring,
Big enough to forgive her on not loving me.
And forget her for a new start.

I smiled with salty eyes,
(Is this the way, I want her to remember me?)

Well, may be, because once I was a poet.

Was?
Yes, was!

Since, then l lost my capacity of abstraction,
When I accepted that,
No one comes back in love.
They lie, they cheat, and they deceive,
But they don’t come back.
I learned this lesson,
and closed the last window.

Then I realised,
The more we become misanthropes, the more we need the others to heal our souls.

And a moment before it,
I promised myself, Of “Sublimation”.

(Poor me.)

(- Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green.
Special thanks to my blogger friend Gaby Pretorian – USA with hugs and smiles)

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Night passed away.
Morning bloomed like flowers in the garden,
I waited long for this day,
But the sun didn’t rise.
I kept holding all the words on the broken edges of my lips,
But no truth emerged from the ashes of my lies.
(My own lies; only for me, and all by myself)

Standing at the corner of the corridor,
I glanced at the fountain.
(Fountain of hope, surrounded by the youthful trees of dreams)
Water was projecting up and falling down,
On the deserted land of great expectations.
I found a shadow, standing under one of the trees.
(Someone, with long hairs, dressed in brown)
I tried to delight my eyes by her face,
But there was much fog.
And I felt like a blind.

I looked at the sky.
It seemed all clean but yet unclear.
Dark light struck my eyes,
Without bringing any vision.
I wished, wished and wished,
But the sun didn’t rise.

The shadow vanished in thick air, like smoke.
My spectacles got blurred by the layers of salty mist.
Lost sunshine was mourning deep in my soul.
Passing moments were marking sorrowful ticks at my wrist.

Lines of my palms were all baffled.
Freezing air brushed my coat,
And I shivered,
My heart turned faint and suffered a crack.
I held my shoulders with my own arms and stepped back.
(Stepped back to the same imprisonment of the solitude)

That night, not only my eyes were wet,
But lines of my palms also wrote a fable of tears and regret.
That night, trees cast the burning shadows,
And fountain remained dry.
That night, I kept sitting on the lonely bench,
Escorted by my sobbing cry.
And no one wiped my tears,
Those moments were all about vacuum and fears.

That night, I kept missing you,
But your face was not for my eyes.
I was left with total eclipse.
That night, the sun didn’t rise.

(- Writer: Nay Af/Autumn Green)

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